Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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