Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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