He asked to "fluff my boner.."
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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