she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
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