I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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