My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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