I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
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I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
that is very illegal...i love you.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
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