I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every concussion has its silver lining
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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