You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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