Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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