I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
You're like the curious george of whores
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
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