They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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