I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
My hand turned me down
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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