i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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