im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
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