dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
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It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
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Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
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