This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize