Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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