I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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