its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
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