I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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