How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
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I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
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Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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