just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize