my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Dicks are not precious.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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