I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize