Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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