I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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