im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
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