You're completely useless in the revolution.
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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