He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I'm bleeding and have questions
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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