i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Randomize