Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
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