you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
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I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
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Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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