I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
please come you make the beer taste better
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
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I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
The chlamydia really affected his face.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
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