I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
did i walk over a car last night?
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize