I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
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