you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize