I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
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