everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
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The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
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Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
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