I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
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