Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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