Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
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I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize