I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize