Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
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