if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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