why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize