A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
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Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize