My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize