3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize