I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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